The Fable of the Slim Girl Who Tried to Keep a Date That Was Never Made

Warda Howard

Royal Douglas

George Ade

Once there lived a Slim Girl who led a lonely life in a rube town, dreaming of her Ideal. But the party failed to show up. Things went from bad to worse and from worse to Waukegan, where she married Ernest, who had been kicked in ...

Richard Foster Baker

Once there lived a Slim Girl who led a lonely life in a rube town, dreaming of her Ideal. But the party failed to show up. Things went from bad to worse and from worse to Waukegan, where she married Ernest, who had been kicked in the head by a mule and believed everything he read in the Daily Sun. Ernest could put an anvil into a farm wagon if anyone wanted to bet him the segars, but every time be lifted an axe something caught him in the small of the back and he had to lie down. One day Ernest, being too lazy to move into the shade, was sun-struck and passed away without an effort. The widow put all the money into a marble shaft marked "At Rest." She was looked upon as a martyr. However, she became the wife of Mr. Gladden, who owned the general store. Gladden built a new house; they hired a girl, and had the washing sent out. She bad everything she wanted. Consequently, the Slim Girl was very miserable, thinking of the jewel she had lost. Moral: If the woman thinks he's all right, you keep on your own side o' the fence.

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The Fable of the Slim Girl Who Tried to Keep a Date That Was Never Made

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