Deadly Park with a serial killer running amok!

Barry Bostwick, Kristina Klebe, Susan Slaughter, and Hannah Minx in Slay Belles (2018)

Kayden Kross in Cooking with Kayden (2011)

Maribel Bermudez

Ken Brewer

Craig Burlingame

Meri Gyetvay

A bounty hunter and an investigative reporter join a group of locals while they try to stop a killer from slashing his way through a public park.

Death Park: The Beginning

Park Bores: The Fan-of-Dumb Menace

It shouldn&apos;t be surprising that &quot;cheap horror movie where killer dons a Trump mask&quot; is now a bonafide genre of films. Being the most boring one of the lot is nothing to brag about.

(I really have to wonder if these titles are made by supporters of the former President who get off on pointless deaths or people who hate him but have nothing else to say. Surely the field is ripe for a more nuanced and interesting take.)

At any rate, the plot is basically: random person walks in park, random person is killed, repeat. Yeah. Like a dozen or more times, sometimes depicted and sometimes just in the backstory. Then a bunch of stable geniuses decide that the best thing to do is to kill him, instead of, you know, calling the National Guard. Why does nobody call the National Guard? (See, i already stumbled upon more social satire than this movie has.)

One of the reasons there are so many deaths is because this project is a series of short films stitched together, and each of these films had to have something happen, and all they could think of was more and more killing.

I&apos;m sure I don&apos;t need to say that nobody can act (heck, none of them are even photogenic), it&apos;s shot on video, it has no lighting, and it will never ever have action figures or other merchandise. Oh, wait, it&apos;s just Trump, so, in a sense, it has all that already. You too can own the mask that was used in this movie!

The craziest part is there is a sequel. I will not be watching it, because I can&apos;t imagine there was somehow a huge jump in quality.

Why does this rate a 2 instead of a 1? Well, my rule is that the lowest rating is reserved for movies that don&apos;t even have enough plot or visuals to actually be considered movies. Low bar, for sure, but some things are slightly worse than this.

It shouldn't be surprising that "cheap horror movie where killer dons a Trump mask" is now a bonafide genre of films. Being the most boring one of the lot is nothing to brag about.

(I really have to wonder if these titles are made by supporters of the former President who get off on pointless deaths or people who hate him but have nothing else to say. Surely the field is ripe for a more nuanced and interesting take.)

At any rate, the plot is basically: random person walks in park, random person is killed, repeat. Yeah. Like a dozen or more times, sometimes depicted and sometimes just in the backstory. Then a bunch of stable geniuses decide that the best thing to do is to kill him, instead of, you know, calling the National Guard. Why does nobody call the National Guard? (See, i already stumbled upon more social satire than this movie has.)

One of the reasons there are so many deaths is because this project is a series of short films stitched together, and each of these films had to have something happen, and all they could think of was more and more killing.

I'm sure I don't need to say that nobody can act (heck, none of them are even photogenic), it's shot on video, it has no lighting, and it will never ever have action figures or other merchandise. Oh, wait, it's just Trump, so, in a sense, it has all that already. You too can own the mask that was used in this movie!

The craziest part is there is a sequel. I will not be watching it, because I can't imagine there was somehow a huge jump in quality.

Why does this rate a 2 instead of a 1? Well, my rule is that the lowest rating is reserved for movies that don't even have enough plot or visuals to actually be considered movies. Low bar, for sure, but some things are slightly worse than this.

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Death Park: The Beginning

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